My husband is wearing high heels

It’s always the same question: can you wear pumps as a man? And the only answer is: hell yes! 👍🏼 In this post at first I’ll tell you everything about my first steps in heels. I also write about where I prefer to buy my shoes and a few more experiences as a man in […]

It’s always the same question: can you wear pumps as a man? And the only answer is: hell yes! 👍🏼

In this post at first I’ll tell you everything about my first steps in heels. I also write about where I prefer to buy my shoes and a few more experiences as a man in high heels.

Gently approach or a jump into the sea?

How did I started to wear heels? Well, I have to admit, that in the end you are always smarter. Of course. And that’s why I can tell you: I made the journey unnecessarily difficult for myself. It definitely could have been more easy and chilled… Nevertheless, I would like to emphasize that the way I got into high heels probably was the best way for me. 

The story I am telling you about covers up at least more than a decade! It includes safe spaces, closed curtains, heart attacks and dump thoughts. But in the end it remains a never-ending story.

I probably owned more shoes in my life than an “average” woman is considered to own. And all these shoes have been sold (second hand) again, involuntarily donated or given away. And all that just because I was too shy to admit that these shoes were my shoes.

Sometimes I said, that they belonged to a friend who had “forgotten” them at my place, sometimes they were my ex’s shoes – so on. But hey, who forgets to take his or her shoes with them? At least you need shoes when you are leaving the house. So I think no one really believed me. Honestly spoken I lied every single time. And whenever someone had found them, I just laughed and gave them away. Too bad actually… too much money, really hot shoes and in the end there were thousands of thousands of lies. And the most funny part of the whole story is, that nowadays when I am telling the truth: again, nobody believes it 😂… so there is nearly no difference, is it?

The first time I wore so called women’s clothing in public was more than ten years ago in a denim mini, gray boot heels and a women’s winter jacket. I wore it on the footpath between two areas of the town we lived in. I had my (ex-)girlfriend with me and we walked from her house to mine – at night at 1 o’clock in the winter on a slippery street… and to be honest we were anything but sober.

For her it was kind of a “funny” thing forcing me to walk in this outfit. She always chalked it up to a “dare” anyway. She thought, that I don’t “want” to do it, so kind of a humiliating thing. I played my role pretty good! Until, after two years, I slowly ran out of arguments for even more clothes, shoes, etc.

She was also the one who first put me in a flared leo skirt at carnival, with a pink top and black ballerinas – anything else would have been too hard. But my first real public experience in high heels came almost two decades later.

My first pair of “own” high heels

So I bought the first pumps in black and wore them – of course – on carnival. It was the first time in public. First time on a party. First time when others can see me. But it was carnival. That is then the so-called protected setup. No one will assume, that it is a passion and not just a disguise or “fun”. Im Germany we have an event called “Altweiberfasching”, which means old women carnival – literally translated. On that day everyone who wants and dares to do it dresses up as a woman.

The first time on heels in a store

Not really carnival, but again a very different and safe environment, would then be the erotic scene. Yes, you read that right! One day I suddenly wore extreme heels in an erotic boutique in Hamburg (famous for its large erotic strip). Suddenly I stood in front of sales persons and other customers! But I have to admit that I did not enter the store with heels. It was my wife’s idea to try them on. And so I did! 

Those kind of heels were reeeally high! But it felt great.

In the end I played the game and wore an absolute full montour in the locker room. Black platform shoes, red corset and a dress – with my wife always on my side.

Now things are getting serious

The pattern with the black feminine shoes in public returns again and again, so it is constantly present in my life. On my first time being in public during the day, without any reason like carnival etc., was in black heels. To be more precise I wore black ankle boots. For me it was a little scary at first, because you could “hear” me while walking. And in the morning hours it wasn’t very loud in the surrounding. Is just something completely different than walking in shoes with normal rubber soles. But it was no problem at all. I walked from the hotel room to the elevator and from there through the crowded hotel lobby to the reception, as if it is totally normal for a man to wear high heels. It’s all about mindset! As far as I could tell, not even one person turned around and looked at me.

And that’s the point! No one really cares about you! They are busy with their own feelings and thoughts. And as long as you do not care of others as well, everything is fine. Of course there are people who definitely will look at you and your style. Some might react offended. Some interested. Others amused. And again others will react supportive. But it would be the exact same situation when for example your shirt would be dirty or something else. But nobody will harm you. No one will throw things at you. They will “just” look! But they would look even if you are a woman wearing heels! There will be people that will have an eye on you and your shoes. And that’s simply because the shoes are loud and beautiful! And if you’d wear extreme heels in a local restaurant, they will look at you also. Because you are different! You do not match into the whole situation. And from my perspective nowadays not many men are brave enough to wear heels in public – so that phenomen still is “different” and that’s why people will look at you. 

Sure, my heart beat and my adrenaline level were really high during the walk through the hotel lobby. At least over a dozen couples waited at the reception to drop their keys and pay the bills. People walked in and out. And outside on the street, because of the excellent weather, there were also massive numbers of people and pedestrians. Perfect conditions and exactly what I would describe as the ice cold water. There was no return! I stood there in my skirt, pullover and ankle boots. But I tried to be as normal as I could. And that was the deal. No one cared.

After we finished the checkout process my wife comes up with a great idea. She told me to walk to the local bakery with her and get some food for our way back home. Uff… I just managed the reception situation and should now jump into a crowded place? What a great idea! I am sure that there is absolutely no one on the streets. They will be empty. Because no one is doing breakfast on sunday morning. No one. And I won’t meet anyone, because everyone is at home sleeping… I am very sure that every street in Hamburg is empty on Sunday morning. Nobody. Absolutely nobody. (I think you got the point, right 😉?)

And as if somebody has known, the steeets were totally crowded. Full of people enjoying their breakfast, enjoying the morning sun. Even the bakery we wanted to buy some snacks had a bunch of people waiting in front of – because it was too crowded inside. And to be fair: that was too much for me! I wasn’t couraged enough to go into the shop between a bunch of people.

Practice, practice and practice

Right before you jump in such situations, you’ll have to practice a lot. No matter which gender you are walking in heels looks terrible if you aren’t safe in those shoes. If you tutter, lurch or do not manage to walk elegantly, you should practice, practice and again practice walking in heels. You can do that at home. Even if you don’t want to disturb your neighbours, you can walk on carpet instead of tiles floor. You also could decide to practice in the morning, when probably everyone is leaving their houses, so you do not disturb as well. By the way, parking areas are perfect practice places on weekend or holidays, because no one is there and walking on concrete feels a lot different to carpet, tiles or other surfaces. The night is a perfect time to practice in public as well, because it’s dark and maybe the streets are empty. 

A good resource for training walking in heels is youtube. You find so many videos there – and yes you are reading that right. If you do not have a friend, girlfriend or other person who is good or excellent in walking heels and can give you tipps while training, use youtube video tutorials to gather information and hints on how to perfectly walk in your shoes. There are techniques in how to improve your walk. And keep in mind: every heel is different. So you maybe should never try them on and go outside without trying to walk in them one single meter before. 

Use parties, carnival and other events, where it isn’t a big deal wearing them. Halloween is by the way a perfect, extraordinary event for that. Because you “just” dress up. And how about dressing up as a female zombie or nurse wearing red, nice pumps? And concluding: there is only one thing you have to do… have fun wearing your heels in public! 

What do you think about the topic? Should men wear heels too? And if not, why do you think it isn’t a good idea to do it? Tell me your opinion below in the comments! I am looking forward for more perspectives on that topic. Best!




1 Comment

  1. Hello, interesting story. My wife put a pair of high heel boots on me a month ago. She makes me wear them around the house now. I don,t have a say so about it. My wife is a very, big, large, Hawaiian lady, 6’3″& 325lbs. Very strong! Me, L.O.L. I,m 5,6″ 150lbs., not strong.we are in our 50,s& we been married 4 years. She does security& I,m a real estate agent. I do look very feminine& act also, but I,m not gay in anyway. I have a short,sassy,woman hairdo, clean shave. My wife does my hair. She puts light make up on me. I dress professional, but I do wear women,s business suits sometimes cuz mens are big for me. We always play wrestle& of course she owns me. Spankings, facesitting,,s all in good fun. A month ago I came home & she picks me up as always& slams me down on our wrestling mat.she flips me over face down& she sits on my back& she takes off my shoes& I feel her putting on some other shoes& I hear a zipper on both. I ask, what she,s doing& she laughs.she gets off me& tells me to get up. I get up and look down at my feet& I,m wearing shiny black,ladies high heel boots knee high, she even tucked them in my pants. I,m astonished, my mouth& eyes wide open. She asks if I like them& I reply,” they,re ladies boots”. She laughs& tells me that they don,t look any different than the ones I wear every day, men dress boots, 2 inch heel. These were 5 inch heels! L.O.L. She said they looked good on me. She makes me walk around the house, I look in the mirror(wow) they do look good on me, but I felt strange. I walk around the house& she takes me outside to our back yard. I look at her speechless. I was wearing white slacks, real tight,& a grey satin collared shirt. She picks me up& sits me down on our chaccuzzi& pops up my collar, fixes my hair& puts a little foundation on my face, smiling & laughing. I look down at the boots; I,m wearing high heel boots! L.O.L. she picks me up off the chaccuzzi& slaps my butt hard, as usual. Keep walking, she says. I keep walking & I look in a mirrorL.O.L. I kind of look like a lady! I smile & keep walking. When I come around the kitchen& she says” them boots make your booty move” I laugh & say ” thank you” I,m liking the boots now& walk good in them. She sits down on the sofa& tells me to sit also.We cuddle up& start kissing & carressing& roll down onto the floor& roll around until she sits on top of me, my head in between her legs,as usual. “You like the boots”? she ask,& I softly say “yes” Good, she says,& tells me I,m going to wear them every day.What? I reply, to work also? If u want, she says. She gets off me& goes to the kitchen& gets two glasses of wine. She yells” get up”& I do& she gives me the wine& says,” keep standing there. I drink the wine. She puts music on,sits down on the sofa& shouts ” dance” I look at her& she yells “c,mon, shake dat booty”& dance”! She put on Spanish music& I start dancing for her. In high heel boots. She makes me wear high heel pumps, stilletos,& boots mostly. She made me wear the boots when we went to Hollywood. I think she wants to make me into a lady. will happen whether I want it or not!!i did see a wig catalog the other day. She started calling me LADY BOOTZ& MS.BOOTY


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Written by The man in dress

Since my youth, I have worn that certain something. My closest confidants may not know about it, but it still defines me. It is the freedom to do what I want and what "one" simply doesn't do. It makes me feel complete, accomplished and simply comfortable. Nevertheless, I am not what "one" would classically imagine such a person to be. Neither do I like people of the same sex, nor do I want to change mine. Quite the opposite. I am one hundred percent satisfied with myself and my body. And my partner, whom I love more than anything, feels the same way. She not only knows it, but supports me all the way. Now I am very happy that I inspire you. Whether you are just curious, a woman with a partner who does the same as me - or simply a man who would like to do but cannot or does not dare.

Get your copy of my new book!

“Help my husband wear women’s clothes”.
If this is on your mind or if you are the man yourself, then I have written a book for you. A humorous all-rounder with facts, figures and stories as well as real-life situations. You will get new perspectives on the topic and what you can do if your man wears women’s clothes, or if you are the man who does and you would like to teach your partner.

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